Roldan, Spain

["Rollin', rollin', rollin'...." (or whatever the official title is to the Rawhide theme song)]

I took an entire week of vacation this summer, which is quite unusual for me (particularly as it did not involve a trip to the United States, which automatically tacks on a couple of days just for travel). I wasn't sure how it would go as I am generally not very good at relaxing, but I really did need some time off. And I needed (really needed) to work on my golf game. So I decided to head to Spain with a friend. Roldan, Spain, in particular, as a friend-of-the-friend had just bought an apartment/condo in a new development centered around a brand new Jack Nicklaus course. What's not to like? Well, more on that later.

One generally flies into Alicante, Spain and then drives an hour or so to get to Roldan. Fine. Only one small (and really quite unbelievable) problem - Lufthansa does not fly there directly from Frankfurt. Horrors! So I decided to dust off my OneWorld membership and fly on Iberia, which involved connecting through Madrid.

Um, let me just say that Iberia was not as, um, punctual as is Lufthansa. I'm not sure if it was special for our flight or if this is a regular occurrence. I had about an hour to make the connection and I had been through Madrid before and it didn't seem like a large airport (again, compared to ORD or FRA or MUC), so it seemed doable. Orrrr.....not.... We were delayed for some unknown reason (they didn't share this information wtih us - or at least not in English or German), so we landed 10 minutes prior to departure. Not so good. So I was hustling through a interminably (no pun intended) long terminal, thinking I had no chance of catching the flight since the doors on a Lufthansa flight would already be closed by this time, I was pretty sure. But no worries - when I got to the gate, they hadn't even STARTED boarding. Whew! We boarded about 30 minutes later and were equally delayed in our arrival to Alicante, but no big deal.

At baggage claim, I was shocked and delighted to see that my bag had made the connection. But I couldn't even find the area where bulky luggage items would be unloaded. Turns out they are put on the regular belt with everything else. Which belt had now stopped with no sign of my clubs. Doh! So I filed a baggage claim, they gave me an internet site and a phone number where I could check the status and off I went.

Shortly after this, I realized that the phone number didn't work. (Yes, I had added the country code.) I kept getting some odd message in Spanish that even I could hear said something to the effective of "number cannot be used." I thought maybe it was like when you call a toll-free number in the US from outside the country and they announce that it's not free outside the US and international charges would apply. But for those circumstances, you just wait and the call (usually) finally goes through. Not so here. I decided I would just wait until we got to the condo and then try the web site for information.

But first we had to find the darn place. The GPS we were using could not find the location where I was supposed to go, assumably because the place was new and the streets weren't in the GPS yet. Hmmmm.... We looked at the materials from condo owner that described the property for more information on how to get there. Nothing. So we tried using our respective (notoriously poor and slow) BlackBerry web browser to find out more information. Nada. Hmmmm.... Well, how big could Roldan be? We could at least point the GPS there and then perhaps it would be obvious. Or....not.... Even with a stop to ask for directions at a gas station. The place seemed to be the best-kept secret around! And then, in the distance, there was a cluster of white buildings near the edge of the hills that looked like it they might possibly be like the white buildings pictured in the materials from friend-of-the-friend. And that's how we finally found the place.

The development was huge, though a couple skeleton structures suggested that perhaps the complex had been developed around the time of the economic crisis and there was perhaps not enough funding to continue. This would also be supported by the lack of any general retail area, such as the "town square - coming soon" that apparently was traveling an awfully long way to get there if the signs were any indication. (It actually reminded me of the Metra Market that was "coming soon" across the street from the condo I bought in Chicago but only materialized over 5 years later after I had already moved to Germany.) The names of the streets that were athletes also was perhaps slightly dated as it still contained Lance Armstrong Way, though I don't know if he was cleared of those charges ultimately. Noticeably, though, there were virtually no cars around. Maybe that's because the summer was over (it was early September), but still....

So, after a quick tour of the place and a review of the materials that had been provided, the gap between expectations and reality became quite clear. A few examples....

Brochure: Air conditioning pre-installed

Reality: Duct work, perhaps, but no functionality. It was over 30 degrees Celsius (in Fahrenheit - "hot" or "too hot to not have A/C") each day I was there.

Brochure: Pool

Reality: Pool with two park benches. No lounge chairs. No shade umbrellas.

Brochure: Flat screen TV

Reality: Did not work

And a few other highlights:

• They were treating for insects two nights, so you couldn't leave windows open. Recall, 30 degrees, no A/C.
• No telephone, no WiFi.
• Maximum of 1 "bar" of cellular coverage while inside
• Apartment was missing a few basics (e.g. salt and pepper (not to be confused with Salt 'n' Pepa), oven mits, baking sheet (imagine trying to bake a frozen pizza without these last two items), dish towels, item for washing dishes, coffee filters, toilet paper, paper towels, trash bags/trash bin -- and the list goes on. In a nutshell, camping in an indoor structure with less airflow than if you were truly camping.

I tried to take a few (okay, a LOT) of deep breaths. It didn't really help. What I really wanted to even try to relax was a place where I could prop up my feet and read a book in the cool/shade. This did not exist.

What quickly became clear, though, was that my idea to use the internet to check the status of my golf clubs was not going to work. So I did what any evil partner would do - begged a peep to help me. Using BlackBerry Messenger, I asked a trusted peep if she was online and, fortunately/unfortunately (since it was a Sunday) she was. I asked her to check the Iberia website and see if there were any other communication means other than the phone number that didn't work or the web site. As it turns out, they had a text message option. So with a text message in a specific format with the lost baggage claim number, I was finally able to contact them. Which didn't necessarily mean that the bags got there in time, but there was contact. Of course, the best part was when someone called me (over 48 hours after my flight had landed in Alicante) saying they could not find the address I had given them on their GPS. Yeah.... But you"re Spanish-speaking! In the end, I had to go to the security guard-shack at the entrance to the development, give them the phone and have them tell this guy where I was really located. Good times.

After I got used to the camping mode, the week got a bit better. Well, that and the very enjoyable golf every day on the course that had only been in operation since January. Really nice. But the true highlight was, on the last day there, when driving back to the complex, I came across a shepherd leading his sheep across the road right in front of the development. Awesome.