It had to happen sooner or later. We all knew this, right? Inevitably, there had to be a day with a little stone in my shoe. A fly in my soup. Some kind of lapse, however brief, in my little love affair with Germany. Or at least Frankfurt. This was, alas, that day. Let the rant begin.
This could actually be a very short rant. At least in comparison to the event(s?) giving rise to said rant. It could be stated as simply as, "I left the office at around 7:14 PM and arrived at the Liv'in at 10:09 PM." That might begin to explain the title of today's blog, yet I feel it would deprive you of the color commentary (aka 'sarcasm') you have come to expect of this blog. So I will rant on. Not for my own catharsis, dear reader, but for you.
Despite having received snow earlier in the day, the road conditions were good as Bonnie and I were motoring our way back to the the city this evening. A terrific day in the office, more friends made, more German words learned, first day in my own office, more great Euro music on the radio -- and then full stop. Traffic backed up just as I was entering the city. Probably an accident, right? Nothing in sight, though, no sirens, no flashing lights, and still good road conditions. No, not even a big concert at the big festival hall area (where tickets to the P!nk concert in March are, alas, sold out). About 100 minutes into the 20-minute commute (I've mentioned Bonnie has a manual transmission, right?), I turned off on one of the last few streets to get to the Liv'in. The second to last street was blocked off. Finally, some flashing lights. Hmmm.... So I moved on and asked Bonnie to kindly find another route home. Which was also closed.
SIP: Back to you, Bonnie.
BBMW: Turn right here.
SIP: I can't. It's closed off.
BBMW: Okay, you need to make a u-turn.
SIP: I can't do that either.
BBMW: Okay, then, make a left and a left and a left.
SIP: That's the same thing as the u-turn that's blocked off.
BBMW: Okay, make a right up here.
SIP: Excellent. An alternate route.
BBMW: And another right, and a left, and a left.
SIP: Bonnie, we tried this before. Still blocked off.
There were several minutes (okay, more like an hour) of this. Every way we went was blocked. I was incredibly frustrated because I really didn't think I would be able to get home. I had these visions of an evening in the office on the yellow (beam!) couch on our floor. With no blanket or pillow (I could add, "with just a stack of workpapers to insulate me from the harsh elements," but I'm sure you've already added in that pathetic thought). Bonnie even tried a couple back streets but we continued to wind up at places where we were not allowed to turn.
I finally asked Bonnie to go to my new apartment, which is on the south side of the river and from which, based on my pedestrian experience the first weekend, should allow us to try some different approaches. We were on the way there and, even near the river, were diverted by the cops. I pointed Bonnie back to the Liv'in but she was seriously confused by this time. I told her I'd explain later and drove up a street that wasn't in her plan, hung a left by the Thai Massage place (by which time Bonnie was doing the GPS equivalent of the robot in "Lost in Space," flailing her arms saying, "Danger, Frau Preuscher, Danger!!"), and a right on the street with the upholstery shop and the weird bookstore, and another right onto the Liv'in's block.
I still don't know what the event was. Or even where it was. But if it had anything to do with Frau Dr. Merkel, I am sooooo removing myself as one of her fans on Facebook. (For now. I still love Angela, deep down in my capitalist heart.) About two hours ago I removed myself from the Frankfurt Polizei fans column as the three I actually stopped to talk to were unhelpful and unfriendly (though admittedly one was kinda cute).
But tomorrow's a new day. Bonnie and I will be quiet on the drive to work aside from my slamming door. But the sunrise or snowfall from my office window will remind me, once again, that every day in Eschborn is a beautiful one.
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